aibhinn_fics: (DT Smile)
aibhinn_fics ([personal profile] aibhinn_fics) wrote2008-01-05 10:26 pm

Crack!fic: A Spoonful of Sugar

Title: A Spoonful of Sugar
Author: [livejournal.com profile] aibhinn
Rating: G
Character(s): Ten, Rose, and a Very Familiar Face.
Warnings: Crack!fic. Serious, serious crack.
Disclaimer: Nobody could possibly believe I think I own any of the characters portrayed here. At least, I hope not. I certainly don't.
Summary: Sometimes Time Lords—or Ladies—are found in the oddest places.
Author's Note: Apologies for this one. I blame [livejournal.com profile] kynaii for the original plot bunny, but posting it is entirely my fault.



Of all the places and all the people Rose had seen in her travels with the Doctor, this was one she never expected.

"You're telling me Mary Poppins is a Time Lord?" she said, disbelief colouring her voice.

"Time Lady, if you please," Mary Poppins said gently but firmly. She was dressed exactly like Julie Andrews in the movie, down to the hat and the brolly with the parrot-head. "There is a difference, as Romanadvoratrelundur would undoubtedly remind you, were she present."

The Doctor grinned. "That's a dead givaway right there," he told Rose. "Nitpicky to the last, my people."

"A reasonable request for accuracy of nominative is hardly nitpicking." Mary Poppins looked him up and down. "You've changed since last I saw you. No more celery?"

"Celery?" Rose repeated blankly.

"Decorative vegetables were all the rage on Gallifrey, and I was going through a fashionable phase," he said dismissively. "Much more importantly than that—how did you survive the War?"

Mary Poppins sighed. "I was with a family at the time, and the Council didn't know how to find me. They were never able to quite understand why I'm rarely in my TARDIS." She touched her carpetbag fondly, where it sat on the bench beside her.

"That's a TARDIS?" This was just getting too weird, Rose thought.

"Certainly. Not all of them have malfunctioning chameleon circuits, you know." But Mary Poppins' gaze at the Doctor's TARDIS was fond. "I do love the old Type 40s, even if they can be difficult to find parts for. Still, my Type 80 suits my needs, though I haven't needed to translate more than the occasional dog conversation for some time."

Rose grinned suddenly. "That's Andrew, right?" Now they were on familiar ground; she'd watched their copy of the movie so often as a child that the tape had broken and her mum'd had to buy a new one.

Mary Poppins blinked. "Indeed. May I ask how you know?"

"Oh, don't give me that," the Doctor said, rolling his eyes. "You knew exactly what would happen when you talked to that Travers woman."

"I certainly did not." Mary Poppins sniffed. "I had no idea Walter would want to make a film of her story. And I certainly never expected to watch an American comedian make a dreadful attempt at a British accent and dance with animated penguins. Utterly undignified. I'm amazed Mrs. Travers allowed it." She paused, and a gleam appeared in her eyes—a gleam that looked remarkably like humour. "Though I do rather like the whole 'spoonful of sugar' bit. I've quite adopted it as my own."

Rose laughed. "You mean it wasn't?"

"Oh, no doubt I said something similar to it, my dear, but Mrs. Travers had such a way with words. It's one of the reasons I chose to tell my story to her. No-one else could have done it justice."

"Be careful," the Doctor told her, "or you'll get Rose set on meeting Uncle Albert."

Rose's eyes widened. "A tea-party on the ceiling? Oh, I always wanted one of those when I was a kid!"

"I'm afraid Uncle Albert's returned to his home planet," Mary Poppins said. "Things were getting too scientific as the twentieth century progressed, and he could no longer get away with simply being considered 'eccentric.' His safety was at stake." She took in Rose's disappointment and added, "But, of course, we could always have one without him. It's not terribly difficult, really; we just have to adapt the Zero Room to human emotional states. The Doctor and I, of course, can modify our gravitational pull ourselves."

Rose blinked and turned to the Doctor, wide-eyed. He winked at her. "Time Lord superpowers," he told her smugly. "So!" He turned back to Mary Poppins. "Tea it is. Your place or mine? And any chance of cakes with edible ball bearings?"

[identity profile] hezmanagirl.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 06:45 am (UTC)(link)
I just love how fictional characters are revealed to be real! *wipes tear from eye*

Thank you for that giggle. :)

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, you're welcome! This fic has been amazingly well-received. I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

(no subject)

[identity profile] hezmanagirl.livejournal.com - 2008-01-06 22:51 (UTC) - Expand
ext_11604: (Default)

[identity profile] effulgent-girl.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 06:49 am (UTC)(link)
OMG! This is the most wonderful thing ever:D I was watching Mary Poppins a few months back; it had been a long time since I had seen it last; and when she started pulling stuff out of her handbag I blurted out real loud "It's bigger on the inside!!" and continued to grin like a loon for the rest of the movie. And now I have a image of the Doctor and Rose having tea on the ceiling with Mary Poppins. :D

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:19 pm (UTC)(link)
When [livejournal.com profile] kynaii suggested this to me, it IMMEDIATELY blossomed into a fic in my head, which means it was just waiting to be written. Seems I'm not the only one to think of this, not by a long shot; guess I should be glad I was the first one to write it! :)
themusecalliope: Vulpes Vulpes (Default)

[personal profile] themusecalliope 2008-01-06 06:53 am (UTC)(link)
Dear Heavens, that never even occurred to me. I'd only thought "Bag of Holding."

Fabulous wee fic.

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, thank you! "Bag of holding" made me laugh out loud, so I guess we've amused each other now! :)

[identity profile] ivydoor.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 06:58 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, that was brilliant. Hee! I will consider this canon now and forever.

It also explains Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:25 pm (UTC)(link)
It does, doesn't it? That must be Rexacorricofallapatorius's sister planet, huh? *g*

Thank you! (Now talk to Uncle Rusty and tell him he needs to give me a job at the BBC!) :D

[identity profile] kynaii.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 06:58 am (UTC)(link)
I humbly accept the blame, and for your further edification, I give you the AIM conversation that set it off!

KynII says:
hey
Lissa says:
Hey
Lissa says:
I'm trying to write three different things, and none are working
KynII says:
I was watching Mary Poppins with my mom, I've come to the conclusion that she is a timelord
KynII says:
her bag is bigger on the inside
Lissa says:
Yes! I totally agree!
KynII says:
she has powerful mental abilites capable of mass hypnosis
KynII says:
and she knows aliens
Lissa says:
I told my sister: "It's a TARDIS bag!"
KynII says:
ie, uncle albert
Lissa says:
Yes
KynII says:
and she has a tardis translating dog
Lissa says:
and can talk to animals
Lissa says:
lol
Lissa says:
wonder if we can get RTD to acknowledge that movie as canon?
KynII says:
and she is tied into the Angel network somehow which explains the floating
KynII says:
AND im sure her talking umbrella is her version of K-9
Lissa says:
undoubtedly
KynII says:
now that we have that settled
KynII says:
what is your problem?
KynII says:
or you could write a Doctor Who/Mary Poppins crossover
Lissa says:
distractedness
Lissa says:
NO NO NO NO NO!!
Lissa says:
NO MORE PLOT BUNNIES!!
Lissa says:
not if you ever want to see your post-Dame Rose Tyler fic.
KynII says:
I think Nine would be properly irritated

Lissa says:
You're going to kill me
Lissa says:
you really are
Lissa says:
fuck fuck fuck
KynII says:
tell you what, share it with Gina
Lissa says:
Oh, God. Now I can SEE Chris Eccleston facing down wasshername
Lissa says:
He's all Oncoming Storm, and she's smiling serenely up at him
KynII says:
Or her being very irritated with Ten
Lissa says:
damn damn damn damn
Lissa says:
*pounding head on back of sofa*
KynII says:
/whistles innocently
Lissa says:
Not funny.
Lissa says:
I'm writing now, darn you
KynII says:
your story? or mary poppins?
Lissa says:
Mary Poppins
KynII says:
lol
Lissa says:
and it's YOUR FAULT
Lissa says:
and i am SOOOOO blaming this on you
KynII says:
kk
Lissa says:
You'll see it when it's done

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! It is now Saved For Posterity. *g*

I'm really glad you suggested this to me, for all my swearing and grousing last night. It's fun! *hugs*

[identity profile] javabreeze.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 06:58 am (UTC)(link)
lmao. It makes sense! I knew Mary Poppins had to have been a Time Lord. Her bag was bigger on the inside.

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:27 pm (UTC)(link)
It was! Enormous plants and floor lamps and all. And funnily enough, the movie came out a year after Doctor Who premiered. Hm.... ;)

So glad you enjoyed the story!

[identity profile] cherryfeather.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 07:08 am (UTC)(link)
OH MY GOD. YESSS. SO MUCH WIN.

Ages back, somebody brought this up for one reason or another in the comments at [livejournal.com profile] pottersues, and everyone was like, YES! Reasons cited: the bag is bigger on the inside, and "Supercalifragilisticexpialadocious" sounds a helluva lot like "Raxacoricofallapatorious."

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:28 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL! I mentioned above that Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious is probably the sister planet for Rexacorricofallapatorius. *g*

So glad you enjoyed the fic! :D

[identity profile] io-aenaria.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 07:24 am (UTC)(link)
*dies laughing, wipes away tear*

Brilliant, absolutely brilliant! A nice treat to read at 2:30 in the morning. And the Doctor's last line is just priceless. Thanks for the great read!

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:29 pm (UTC)(link)
You're welcome! I'm so glad you enjoyed the story. :D

[identity profile] rebelsaint.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 07:52 am (UTC)(link)
Bwahaha, that's brilliant!

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Yay! So glad you liked it. :)

[identity profile] altorogue.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 09:07 am (UTC)(link)
Utter genius! This makes SO MUCH SENSE!

And now I want to watch Mary Poppins. Damn.

"Cream of the crop, tip of the top, is Mary Poppins, and there we stop!"

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:31 pm (UTC)(link)
"Cream of the crop, tip of the top, is Mary Poppins, and there we stop!"

Hee, that's my favorite scene! *g*

So glad you enjoyed the fic--I had a marvellous time writing it. :) Thanks for reviewing!

[identity profile] kayling.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 09:16 am (UTC)(link)
LOOOOOOVE IT! It totally fits! Her bag is Bigger On The Inside! You just simultaneously warped and improved my childhood memories, good job. :D

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:32 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL! Warping and improving simultaneously--just one more service we offer. *g*

So glad you enjoyed the fic--thank you!

[identity profile] nycteris-m.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 10:17 am (UTC)(link)
rotfl!!! of Mary Poppins is soooo a Time Lady! the carpet bag, andrew, tea parties on the ceiling... oh oh and the watch she keeps checking! I was thinking just that when I recently watched the movie - didn't think any one else would have the same idea though - that's brilliant!

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Great minds think alike, eh? :) So glad you enjoyed the story--thank you!

[identity profile] ahedonia.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 10:30 am (UTC)(link)
It makes too much sense not to be TRUE!

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:39 pm (UTC)(link)
That's what I thought! I'm expecting a phone call from RTD any day now... *g*

SO glad you enjoyed the fic!

[identity profile] doctor-addict.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 11:02 am (UTC)(link)
Perfect crack. Like completely perfect.

Mind if I friend you - I do seem to rec your fics to people an awful lot?!!!?

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, thank you! And no, I certainly don't mind at all. Feel free! (And thanks for the recs, too!)

[identity profile] fishface44.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 11:09 am (UTC)(link)
I loved this. I have often thought that my love of Doctor Who is directly related to my childhood love of P.L. Travers' books! Thanks for posting it!

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:41 pm (UTC)(link)
You're welcome. Thanks for the kind words! :):)

[identity profile] roxyk630.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 01:03 pm (UTC)(link)
...

IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Frighteningly so, doesn't it? :D

Thank you so much!

(no subject)

[identity profile] roxyk630.livejournal.com - 2008-01-08 12:46 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] mandragonne.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 01:12 pm (UTC)(link)
As an Anglophile With An Impossible Name myself, I can't help feeling bound to any Whovian Anglophile I would meet on LJ ;)

Can you imagine I discovered crackfics hardly one year ago ? I especially love the Whofics (might have to, er, catharsize the whole emotional deal) and I'm a complete nutter for literary referencies. Alas.

The thing is, the original books are not a childhood reference in France ; but every normal (female) person by the age of twenty-something has seen the film about thirty times a month until (her) fifteen birthday. Yeah. Something like that.

So this is totally a love declaration : I love you-love you-love you ! I'm even more anglophilling right now, if possible :)

Merci !

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh wow, I'm so glad you've enjoyed this so much! It was certainly my intention to make people laugh; I'm glad I've succeeded :) The books aren't a reference here in the States, really, either, but the movie certainly is. There's hardly a child in the country who can't sing "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious"... which is why this was utterly irresistable to write. :)

[identity profile] rommies-voice.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 01:23 pm (UTC)(link)
OMG! How did I not see this before? It all seams so obvious now. Mary Poppins is a Time Lady!

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Of course she is! And practically perfect in every way--my icon even says so. ;)

So glad you've enjoyed the fic!

[identity profile] imaginary-iby.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 01:39 pm (UTC)(link)
I would be so utterly terrified by this, if...

...I hadn't had the exact same thought about her carpetbag. Although, I was going for the similarities between the carpetbag and the Doctor's pockets.

Simply brilliant, as is all your work.

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, thank you! I'm so glad I'm not alone in my twisted little corner of the Who-niverse. :)

[identity profile] dettiot.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 01:50 pm (UTC)(link)
[giggle] Very cute. It seems very appropriate that Mary Poppins is a Time Lord Lady.

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:45 pm (UTC)(link)
I thought so! :) And I appear not to be alone, which is marvellous. Let's all be twisted together! *g*

Thank you!

[identity profile] kitsune17.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 02:23 pm (UTC)(link)
::giggles::

Alright, so Santa and Mary Poppins are Time People. Anyone else?

[identity profile] mandragonne.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 03:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, Tony Blair, apparently. According to the "Dead Ringers" regeneration episode, at least.

(Nicolas Sarkozy might be a Dalek, though.)

Some fic authors have been pretending that Tolkien was a Time Lord ; I stand persuaded that Terry Pratchett is one. But to me, JK Rowling is a human, whatever that may mean ;)

Do you think Russel T. Davies is a Time Lord himself ?

(no subject)

[identity profile] kitsune17.livejournal.com - 2008-01-06 15:09 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] kitsune17.livejournal.com - 2008-01-07 00:47 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] fid-gin.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 04:06 pm (UTC)(link)
This is wonderful! We were watching Mary Poppins just the other night (first time for Mr. gin), and I believe I made a very similar comment regarding her handbag!

Then Mr. gin made me turn it because it was frightening him.

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Aww, too bad. Everyone should watch Mary Poppins. :)

So glad you enjoyed the fic!

[identity profile] dreamin-hope.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 05:24 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thought Mary Poppins' "bigger on the inside" bag was a dead ringer for the TARDIS.

Seriously? Thank you. You just made my day :-D

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, you're welcome! Thanks for the kind words. :)

[identity profile] lilli1553.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 05:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Why ever did you feel the need to apologize in your summary? This was absolutely fabulous!!!!

"Not all of them have malfunctioning chameleon circuits, you know." But Mary Poppins' gaze at the Doctor's TARDIS was fond. "I do love the old Type 40s, even if they can be difficult to find parts for. Still, my Type 80 suits my needs, though I haven't needed to translate more than the occasional dog conversation for some time."

HAHAHAHAHA! I love it!

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Yay! I'm so glad you do. :) I had great fun writing it. Thanks!

[identity profile] jai-23.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 06:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee, the amount of times that I've thought about Mary Poppins being a Time Lady!!! :P Glad to see that I'm not the only one out there!

Fantastic read, thank you! :)

[identity profile] aibhinn-fics.livejournal.com 2008-01-06 08:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, you're welcome! :) Thanks for the kind words.

Page 1 of 3